Sometimes, it's good the way it is

Living abroad has its challenges and I write about these in several of my other blog posts. But sometimes it's also good the way it is. You have everything covered. A good job, stable internet at home, a comfortable bed and just the right amount of darkness so it makes you able to sleep well. No noisy neighbours or rattling air conditioners. No traffic that keeps you awake. Sun in the living room each morning. A view on the hills. And then boredom sets in. You think you've seen it all and you get the so-called 'fear of missing out'. The world is large, as an expat you know that like no other. And life is short. 'How would it be in Buenos Aires?' you question yourself. You imagine yourself walking down the widest boulevard on earth and dancing the tango on leafy, sunny square. 'That sounds like fun, why not get a job there?' Indeed, it would be fun. But just think of moving again, closing your bank account, opening one, cancelling the phone subscription, the gym subscription, leaving your comfort to start over again. That feels, well, very uncomfortable.

That doesn't mean I dislike it and that I never did it. I did it about four times. And I think three-four is the golden number. And then, if you find your place, stay at least four years. Because that's when all the dust settles down and you see if the place is something for you. Besides, at one point, if you live in a safe and comfortable area, you'll start building up something for yourself. You'll have someone you cal call when you're sick. You know what doctors to go to. You know the pharmacy and which one is open 24 hours when you need it. There's a certain sense of comfort that's hart to give up at that point. You know where to go for drinks and what tourist traps to avoid at all cost. You learned it by going to these tourist traps and by ending up with a bad experience sometimes. Also, you'll possibly be blogging or making videos like I am. So I'm deeply involved in the subject now - Bulgaria. I learned the language and know the habits, and integrated into the culture. I feel very much at home. And even though I would definitely go to Buenos Aires or some other place where adventure calls, some days I have to realize how good it is at this very moment. And so should you. But at least do the golden number of 3-4 moves abroad, it will help you grow very much as an independent person.

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Dear Bulgarians, stand up for yourselves

Even though I risk coming off as 'that westerner', I'll do so anyway.

I love Bulgaria and all Bulgarians I met have welcomed me with open arms. I have felt I made the right decision to move here since day 1. My experience is positive. Yet after a few years I certainly started seeing points for improvement. Outside the political climate, which I don’t know much about and have no influence on, there are minor changes we still need to go through here. One is standing up for oneself. Every day I see examples of people letting themselves being treaded on and I wish to see it changed or at least make people think.

One minor example of today was at the supermarket Billa. A German chain but obviously run by Bulgarians. There were long queues and people waited for at least 5 minutes. Above the registers there’s a sign saying "Guarantee, 1lv voucher if you wait more than 5 minutes." So I dared to ask for it, as the only client doing so. Even though most if not all clients had read the large sign. The lovely lady behind the registry, whom I’ve seen there for years, directly fell silent and said: "I don’t have vouchers. But I’ll give you the 1lv. These chefs here, you know.." She took it from her own pocket and gave it to me. I took it and thanked her, knowing she’s a grown woman and trusting she would later compensate this with her boss or directly with the registry. But as I left the store I directly reconsidered and thought she really wouldn’t do so. I felt bad about it and still do.

She didn’t stand up for herself even though she had every right to. The vouchers or money should be taken from the store and not herself. It’s a double negative this way. If enough people had asked for such vouchers instead of nobody, the managers would realise they better employ some more cashiers. The customers didn’t stand up for themselves and neither did the cashier, at her own expense. I’m not here to change the world or even change other people but I am here to share my reflections and at least have a positive impact where I can. And even though his occurrence is so small, it is at the same time very big. Because it happens a lot, on many levels. And I know people are afraid of and at risk to lose their jobs. They don't want to stick out like a sore thumb.

But this is the oldest country of Europe, overrun by many but it stood the test of time. Where’s the extra step, of this proud nation with proud people? I hope to someday see the self-pride and confidence to stand up for oneself. Bulgarians have every reason to be confident and proud. Of their country as well as their own culture and personal competences. People live tough lives, this makes them persistent and I've met some mentally very tough people. This is no longer a tucked away corner of Europe. We’re Europeans and I know the Bulgarians have come a long way. Taking pride in oneself and claiming self-ownership is one of the next steps and I’m sure we’ll get there.

With love to Bulgaria, Leon

You need your rest

There's nothing more rewarding than a good day of hard work, then getting home and popping a beer. You earned it. And the beer sure tastes better than on a lazy Saturday evening, when you spent all morning in bed and the afternoon watching some series. Somehow the events that lead up to popping the beer, everything you did during the day, will determine how well it tastes. You'll have the conscious feeling that you achieved something during the day. And hopefully that you made yourself a better person than you were yesterday. But don't go overboard. Rest is needed as much as oxygen. You can't be on full speed all the time. I had such periods. Especially when traveling. I travel in the Bulgarian winter, flights are cheap and I go find the sun in other countries. This means at least a few trips and weekend breaks each month. You'd think that makes you relax but quite the contrary. The trips are too short to even take a breath or relax. Especially if you handle my walking speed and the amount of sights crammed into a tight schedule. I don't regret any of my trips. Perhaps just the one time where I had only one hour in Venice. Apart from that, I loved all of them. And I don't compromise, because I travel alone. I can only blame myself if I don't like my trip or feel too rushed.

Recently I settled down a bit more. Perhaps it's the age. Or just common sense, in the way that my life gets better when I take it slower, one minute at a time. I lost the wild feathers of spending 10 hours on a bus on Friday night and getting back on Sunday night. Yes, I'm tempted to make many more trips, but I'm choosing for some more relaxation now. I found that I feel more relaxed when I stay in on the weekend, perhaps just go work out and do the laundry. Never thought I would enjoy such weekends, but I do. People even said I looked well-rested, which is quite a sign. I went to the city park, where I rarely come, and questioned why I even need to go outside the city with such a large forest right near my home. I tried working out every day. It made me exhausted. I feel far better with a day of rest in between. I saw hiking as relaxation but then ended up walking 30 kilometres. Anything but rest. This is performance as well. Keep in mind that rest makes you a more productive member of society. You're not a work horse. You're a human that can decide when it needs rest. And best is to listen to it. Yes, almost every time your body tells you to not go to the gym and you go, you'll know it tried to trick you into laziness. But if you're really sour at the squat rack, better go for a slow walk on the treadmill instead. Don't drain your batteries to the point where you don't even notice it anymore. Rest leads to a longer lifespan. And even if you feel you don't need it, your rest will turn you into a better version of yourself. As opposed to when you'd just keep going. Take off some of the speed, enjoy the sunset, really enjoy the cup of coffee you're having. Go to a spa, get a massage. These are the moments you'll end up remembering.

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